Heads up: This post is 12 years old. My thinking may have evolved since then — read it with that in mind.
Is it just me? Or is Hong Kong’s adults quite hostile to young children? I had previously written hospital staffs treating children like objects, my experience taking my son Luc for an X-Ray. It’s such a daily part of life here that people don’t see anything wrong with it. I’ve gotten so used to it that I was shocked when I flew to Okinawa last October for the Regional Startup Weekend Organizers Summit and my family tagged along for a mini vacation. Everyone there, even the security guards at the airport, were super friendly to my “naughty” children.
Here in Hong Kong, if you and your kids stand in Science Museum’s parking lot, at night, when there’re clearly no cars, their security guard will shush you away. If you ignore him, he will walk over to block your kids’s view of the dinosaur laser show! If you kids ride their balance bikes in a residential development’s driveway, (or just about anywhere else), security guards will yell at your kids! Telling them to “be careful”. Well I think my child is being plenty of careful already, not to mention I’m walking right by him. But it seems that what they really meant was “Don’t ride you bike, at all!” When they see that you are not telling your kids to stop whatever they are doing, like a proper parent should, they’ll talk to your kids directly! Shaming them for being a kid!
Today, my friend Masahiro Kuwata recounted his story from yesterday, where he was asked to set up some kids activities at the Tai Po Art Center. He was taken aback by the local parents, yelling at their children for touching, holding, exploring just about anything! “I was really surprised. Usually with Japanese parents, they’re happy to see their kids play. But yesterday, these parents yelled at their children very loudly for picking up anything. The children felt afraid and shame. Why do they do that?”
Why indeed. At The Mulberry Tree Progressive Unschool, we revisit our “Image of Children” and reflect on our interactions with our children everyday! Similar to Harvard Center of Child Development’s Building Adult Capabilities to Improve Child Outcomes theory that I had talked about, I believe the overall adult population’s “Image of Children” needs to change in order for the whole society to embrace children in the city, and therefore improve children’s outcome.
Take a look at Mulberry Tree’s “Image of Children”.
The Mulberry Tree Progressive Unschool’s Image of Children
Children are capable.
Children can discover and do things by themselves.
Children discover things in their own time.
Children own their emotions, they have the right to feel whatever they feel.
Children move at different paces.
Children are naturally curious, they ask questions and they formulate answers to questions, they don’t need to know the answer right now.
Children are unbiased.
Children are decision makers.
Children can be trusted, they are worthy of our respect.
Children are creators.
Children are scientists, and play is their research.
Children construct their own knowledge.
Children are independent and strong.